People seldom do what they believe in. They do what is convenient, then repent.
- Bob Dylan
These words haunt me daily. Although maybe not in the way good ol’ bobby intended. I apply this to more than my beliefs, I apply it to my job. Applying anything to your job is always scary so I usually try not to apply myself at all. But that doesn’t provide much in the way of results. And maybe that’s just a front anyway so I don’t seem disappointed when I get effed in the A at the job. But that’s a topic for another day.
It’s a pretty decent day in officeland. I’ve got Johnny Cash singing to me via mp3 technology and $10 speakers from target. One of which doesn’t even work. But the sun’s out, it’s Friday, and I wore a tie again to work out of a bizarre form of spite so I feel good and I look incredible. Seriously, I look good. I’d do me. But that’s neither here nor there. Or even there...Okay, stop looking.
I bring this up, this fabu quote, because I don’t do what I believe in. I believe in writing, in movies and music and anything creative that actually excites a person. Hell, a model trainset is cool if the person is into it. I’m not, but it’s really just a spiffy lego set for adults and I’m always ready for some lego action.
So I believe in artsy stuff and practical stuff and things that people can say they’re passionate about on 24 hour entertainment channels when they just keep on talking so you don’t notice it’s 2 am and you’ve been watching a retrospective of Freddie Prinze Jr’s career for the last 45 minutes. I don’t really feel passionate about much. If anything really. Every once in a while it pops in for a quick how do you do but it’s not consistent. I don’t really trust people who say they’re passionate. It may have something to do with all the rappers who say they’re passionate about rap when really they’re just talking about girls and money and weed. You’re passionate about that? It just seems stupid and I don’t think the rappers are stupid so I have to assume they’re just lying. Which is fine, I’m okay with lying.
So I don’t do what I believe in and I definitely do what’s convenient. Risking my ego and a paycheck for a new job I care about is just so much damn work. It would really cut into my sitting around time man. And I don’t need that do I? Maybe I do. Maybe I’d love it. Here’s hoping I find out soon.
- Harmon
