“Who’s the brains of this operation?”
“Uh, this isn’t really a brains-type of operation.”
That’s a great line from an otherwise ho-hum little movie called Way of the Gun. I think the screenwriter also wrote The Usual Suspects. I have no idea who he is and I fancy myself something of a writer. I could cruise over to imdb and check it out but again, if I haven’t stressed it enough to this point, I’m not really into research. I think his name was Chris something. Anywho, that’s not really the point. If it were the point I’d probably find out who did it. The point is that the writer either completely missed the mark on WOTG or he made a deal with the devil to write TUS and was obviously distracted with the whole “eternity in hell” thing when he continued his career and has quietly disappeared from the scene. I’m guessing he didn’t make a deal with the devil, I mean Suspects was good but I don’t know if it was THAT good. Know what I’m sayin’? So did he just get incredibly lucky or were the stars aligned or what for his first movie? And more importantly did he sneak that great line into the Gun just to remind us that he still has that ability? I only ask because I’m a baseball fan...
I bring this up because baseball has just seen a team play so far above their collective heads that they actually tarnished the World Series by not only appearing but by actually winning the thing. The White Sox, or as I like to think of them, the stupid, cocksucking white sox, had their deal with the devil season. I have never seen so many lucky bounces or small decisions work in their favor when all logic would seem to be saying that they were making a mistake. I’m thankful because I know they can’t repeat their past success, much like Chris whoever after The Usual Suspects. But that doesn’t erase their win from the record books and that’s what pisses me off. The only team I hate as much as the Yankees has won the Series. A team that is known for throwing games, a long history of horribly cheap owners like Comiskey and now Reinsdorf and his “hey let’s shut down the season in ’94 and hope no one blames me 11 years later”, a team that thinks Olde English is still a cool font. This is the reason why people think the devil is making all these deals. No way God was handing a Series title to these douchebags. I guess that’s where my comparison fails. I don’t really know Chris Whathisface’s history but I doubt he failed his writing classes in high school on a bet because he wasn’t getting paid enough by the school paper. I’m guessing he didn’t write his script in Olde English either. Just a guess there but I’m assuming 120 pages of that stuff would cause a seizure. I guess what I’m trying to say is that I hope we’ve seen the last of the stupid, cocksucking white sox in the Series for a while. Next year they’ll have a nice little run, much like a great line in a movie, and then they’ll fade away. Hopefully for another 85 years or so. Some call that sort of thing spiteful. I call it justice.
