Wednesday, January 23, 2008

Sarsaparilla Cowboys

Quitting smoking before his ten year reunion is something Miguel considers the biggest regret of his life. He began smoking in order to hang out with the cool kids in high school; what sort of holier than thou attitude does it take to stop four days prior to seeing them again? Also, there would be nothing finer than drowning this stress for arriving unadorned, unemployed and broken-up to the social event of the season, than the silky, sweet inhale of that cigarette.

Towards the door, a cloud of smokers stand, smoking gloriously, in the frozen sub zero temperature. He leaves the car running, warming his gloveless hands by cupping them and exhaling warm, humid air.

His motivation rapidly eroded forty minutes ago when Elisabeth called telling him she wouldn't make it-- "The sitter didn't show up; I'm so sorry. Max, went out with some friends and I can't get him home. Go, though. If I get a hold of Max I'll see if he'll come home, and I'm trying to find another sitter, it's just that it's late. I really want to be there with you."

Fucking Max. Fucking Fuck that Fucking Fucker.

Miguel eyeballed the highway again, looking North then South for a gas station that he could purchase a pack of cigarettes. His mind slipped from gear to gear, and he changed the radio station to sort himself out. A country song came on that solidified the moment.

Mindy O'Neal, of the more popular girls, walks by the car, peaking her head in and doing an awkward wave. Time has passed so that the stratification of popularity has been destroyed; still Miguel knows his place well enough not to do more than wave back. With a certain air of satisfaction he notices that Mindy has put on weight; with an air of loathing he figures it is probably from having children or doing something meaningful with her life.

Miguel drums his fingers against the steering wheel, before taking out the phone to stare at it again. He types out another message of guilt and grief, then folds it back up without sending it. He looks at the bar, and changes the song on the radio again.

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