I have a weird thing going on with the Minnesota Timberwolves. I don't watch their games. There are a myriad of reasons for this. I hate how refs can tilt the balance of the game. I hate watching amazing athletes who can literally jump out of gyms stand around and fist bump each other after every free throw. I hate free throws. They seem like a rule that was thrown in so that slow, whitish dudes had a chance to score too. I hate the fact that people pretend that coaches are necessary. And that coaches are given roughly 23 timeouts per half. There are more reasons for why I don't watch the games but I think you get the point.
I do, however, read about their games in the paper every day and listen to commentary about the team on the radio though. It's kind of weird. I'm like a voyeur. It's like I'm stalking someone actually. I never get close enough to get noticed. While the team is going for a walk around the lake I'm cleverly hidden behind a bush. When KG takes the team out for ice cream sundaes I'm sitting behind the Metro section of the Strib watching them without being noticed. You can see how it could be creepy.
I think the Wolves have slowly turned into something very much akin to Jennifer Aniston for me. I don't watch her movies (unless they're on tv for free) and I don't watch her show (unless the Little Lady has commandeered the remote). So even though I actively miss all of Jennifer's "day job" I still know waaaaaaaay too much about her thanks to the countless magazines and sites devoted to celebrities.
I like her, I hope she's doing well, and let's face it she's not too hard on the eyes. But I don't really care about her life in any tangible way. I still feel like a stalker though. I know all these bizarre things about her and yet she doesn't know me at all.
So by now you should see that the Wolves are very much like Jennifer Aniston. And yet not at all. I don't, for instance, want to see any of the current or former Wolves in a French Maid outfit. Which apparently Jen will be wearing in her next movie according to the good folks over at joblo.com. I guess you could make a case that they are very much alike when it comes to basketball though. I don't want to watch either of them play the game.
I suppose there's a bigger issue here about the way we follow celebrities and teams in some half assed effort to live vicariously through them. I'm not really interested in that though. And heck, I don't want to live an NBA life or a celebrity life. I wouldn't mind the money, I think I could find some good ways to use it, but it's not something I would really enjoy otherwise. It literally would take millions to convince me that hanging out with Ron Artest or the kid from Malcolm in the Middle is a good time.
I will say one thing though, Brad Pitt sure fucked up.
2 comments:
what about college ball?
The shorter 3 point line has hurt the game in a major way. Watch an Illinois game sometime. It's either a layup or a 3, there's no midrange game anymore. The overall game is better because there's more passion from the players (for lack of passion in the nba see: Kandi-ass, Michael or the entire Portland Trailblazers) but it's still a flawed game.
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