- Bede Jarrett -
- The House of Gold -
i have no idea who Bede Jarrett is so if he (or she) happens to be the founding member of your local I-Hate-Whatever-It-Is-That-You-Are branch i apologize. i just like the quote. i'm sure horrible people get quoted all the time, so maybe i'm contributing to the issue. i'm not above the law here. perhaps there's an anti-quoting of bad people blog out there with a mission and i am working immediately to oppose it in my first post. so be it. if it makes the creator of said site happy i'd probably check it out some day when i'm bored at work. but that's neither here nor there. i have no idea what's to come on this precious little blog i'm pumping out but i can pretty much guarantee it will be more interesting than anything i do this week at work. so here i sit.
this is a place for me and some of my friends (and some of my acquaintances) to come hang out and pretend people in the world care what we think. wait, that's not exactly true. we don't really care what you think. or do we? there's really no telling is there? this is mostly a place to vent. sitting at the inlaws playing cards isn't really the best time and/or place to go off on a diatribe about why the Football Gods are asleep at the switch or why we as a society are hell bent on designing our lives to be dependent on computers when they can absolutely ruin your life just with one push of the button or one accidental fall from a 15th floor window. for one thing i can swear a lot more here... fuck yeah.
i'd like to point out that it took me three reboots to get my computer to pull up the internet tonight. i have no idea why. maybe there was a server issue or maybe a connection issue or maybe i have spamware on my hard drive from looking at "those" sites and my lovely little blocker didn't block when it should have. the point is, no one knows. and by no one i mean me. okay, there might be some 16 year old idiot savant in ohio or some guy who has never "known" a woman in the biblical sense but why are we relying on people that would be the first ones dead in a martial law feudal lord of the flies bloodbath type thing? does that make sense? i'd like to think i believe in the whole deal where we all balance each other out and everyone's cool for their nerdiness. normally i do think that. but not when my computer doesn't work. how irrational and angry are we at computers? no wonder every sci-fi movie of the past umpteen years is about humans versus robots/computers/cyborgs or whatever. we hate these fucking things. they're uncomfortable to look at even with the spiffy little liquid crystal screens. you know why? because we're sitting two feet from them for 9 hours a day. who came up with that plan? i want to know who the guy is who came up it. seriously if some guy came out from behind the curtain and said "uh, hey there folks. a few years back i was sitting around with my friends playing some d & d and i bet them that i could get people to sit around all day and do mindless tasks and stare at screens and little hourglasses and make them waste 40 hours of their lives every week. i got double or nothing if i occasionally made the thing stop working entirely too. sorry about that. they all paid me off once i got the y2k thing done so you can stop going to work now. it was just a joke. i would have told you sooner but i've been on an island in the caribbean for the past 5 years drinking things that come with umbrellas and learning local customs." i wouldn't even be mad. i'd give the guy some respect with a moment of silence and then go get a job at a pizza place or something.
like i mentioned earlier i have no idea what will be coming next. well, i mean, i have some idea. but overall i have no idea. there are many things i want to find out more about and am fascinated by. like why everyone in minnesota slows down to go over bridges THAT THEY DRIVE OVER EVERY DAY. not that i'm bitter. but what does it say about people who are afraid of something they rely on every day? i'll get to that more later. for now i think we're good to go. if you think i suck, or you think typing in lowercase is lame, just wait. there are others coming along. personally i think i funk out with my junk out - but i'm biased. so there it is.
tomorrow is a new day, fresh with no mistakes. but i'm sure there'll be some rolling around by the time my good friend mule puts up his post. to steal a line from stephen king, mule's the kind of guy who could talk the devil into lighting himself on fire. not that he would, i'm just sayin' he could is all. and to be fair, i probably should say i paraphrased that line because i'm not really into research.
this little corner of the world wide web will be full of a lot more anger in the future. today's just the beginning and, much like al pacino, i'm willing to be fairly normal and dynamic for a while before i just decide to mail it in and yell all the time. if i was half the blogger i used to be, I'D TAKE A FLAMETHROWER TO THIS SITE! AND BY THAT I MEAN I WOULD LIGHT MY COMPUTER ON FIRE (IT HAS IT COMING) AND I'D ALSO LOCATE THE BLOGGER SERVERS AND MAYBE A SATELLITE OR TWO FOR GOOD MEASURE! I DON'T EVEN KNOW IF SATELLITES ARE INVOLVED BUT ONCE I GET YELLING I TEND TO STRUGGLE WITH THE FINER POINTS OF A REASONED ARGUMENT!
so...... i guess it's starting. and don't worry, with the anger comes more current references. unfortunately the man behind the curtain is still hiding out so i'm gonna go to work now. hopefully he'll be coming out soon.
- Harmon
