Motto

There's not a whole lot of philosophy in the big book o' Harmon. I just have one thing that I use in most situations and that's that. And frankly it's served me well to this point.

Fuck 'em if they can't take a joke.

Those are words to live by friends. Life's no fun if you can't rattle an occasional cage or two. I mention this because Ellen (Mule's Above Average Assistant and Waaaaaaaaaay Above Average Racist) cannot take a joke. I gave Todd Dancer her number the other day and well, let's just say the date went well. Fuckably well. And now there are many curious burning episodes whilst peeing and odd little itchy areas. Like it's my fault that she didn't see nothin' wrong with a little bump n' grind? BMC HQ is in shambles thanks to her no joking around philosophy. We may need to let her go. I'm having her type up a report weighing the benefits of such a decision. We should probably have someone else working on this sort of thing but, well, we're pretty lazy.

Hopefully she won't commit any hate crimes today. Fortunately she seems really hung up on "the mangy dogs of greenland". I know this because she's said that exact phrase at least 6 times. I say fortunately because I know no one from greenland. I'm not even confident that they have people there. Or, more importantly, if the people there have come here. It's entirely possible that she's talking about actual dogs. I have no way of telling. I should have her give me a population report on greenland I guess, but that just seems like stirring the pot.

For the moment there is an unsteady truce and I hope to stick to it. Mule is currently stapled to a wall in his office but I think that's one of their "games" that they play. If he can't remember the safety word well, hell, that's just not my problem. I don't know exactly how the whole ball-gag thing works with a safety word. Maybe you pick a word that's easy to say with a gigantic red ball in your mouth? Can I get a ruling? Littlebmouse you must know what that's like, what do you normally do in that sort of situation?

MakeOutCity recently called me on the whole crackdown at work not really affecting my blogging. Wasting time on the interweb is not to be tolerated. And it isn't... If you're a temp. But I've been here a few years and I know what I'm doing. So again, if you happen to be overly literal management types, see my motto.